Tag: Standing for Marriage

Faithfulness

God’s Goodness

Purposed Marriage

Our lives are often viewed with the wrong perspective. We dwell on the things we don’t have instead of being grateful for the things given to us. Looking back in Genesis, Adam and Eve did the same thing. They fixated on the tree’s fruit they could not eat paying no attention to the bountiful forest right in front of them. The serpent easily persuaded them because they began to doubt God’s promises for their lives and lost perspective.

How often does this happen in our marriages? Something or someone captures our attention and we get easily distracted. We look to our friends and family to see what they have and where we may be lacking. Maybe we even get caught up in the world of social media and start playing the comparison game in our hearts and minds. Before we know it, we are coveting our neighbors and wishing for a life other than our own.

This may destroy more marriages quicker than anything else. When doubting God’s goodness, it is likely we have raised our problems as our highest reality rather than God’s Word. In such cases, a change of perspective is needed so we may view our problems through the lens of scripture. We need to be mindful that Satan still uses the same tactics he used with Adam and Eve, he just repackages the lie and delivers it by a different messenger.

Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!
Psalms‬ ‭34:8‬ ‭

Dear friend,
Don’t believe the lie that God’s goodness applies to everyone but you! Today I want to encourage you to believe in God’s goodness and trust He has His loving arms wrapped around you. In your time of trouble, don’t hide like Adam and Eve, but run to our Heavenly Father with open arms. If you are in a season of waiting, be patient and take refuge in Him knowing and expecting God to deliver on all of the promises He has for you. Chances are without the troubles, you may not come to fully appreciate the promises He has given.

In Christ,
Amy Larson

Faithfulness, Healing and Reconciliation, Spiritual Warfare

Finding Freedom from Your Past

Amy Larson

As a biblical counselor, I consider it a great honor to serve and walk alongside individuals that are struggling to find their footing. It wasn’t long ago that I myself was striving. I had lost sight of the cross and was lured in by the enemy who planted doubt and confusion in my mind specifically related to events from my past. (Remind you of Genesis 3 by chance?) I had allowed Satan a foothold into my life and he cleverly twisted my thoughts and skewed my view on reality.

I eventually gave in to the enemy’s temptation and started running in the opposite direction from the Lord and from my husband. I had communicated to Tommy that I had forgiven him, however, I neglected to connect the dots between forgiveness, repentance and reconciliation. Instead of accepting his sincere apology and addressing our marital issues, I paved the road to divorce with bitterness in my heart and wrath on my lips. My words were damaging and were intended to bring about vengeance. Reminding Tommy of his past failures was motivated by my desire to elicit sympathy for myself and inflict pain on him. I felt completely justified in my actions because my heart had grown hardened towards him and I felt he deserved harsh punishment for the way he had treated me over the past 10 years.

As I reflect back, I’m so thankful Tommy was receiving sound biblical advice. Several godly men directed him to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit and disregard mine. He was not bound by my words because the soft whispers of the Spirit drowned out all the accusations I hurled at him. With time, I realized my words were no longer effecting Tommy or his stand for our marriage. I could have attempted to use other weapons in my arsenal, but thankfully God’s plan and pursuit of my heart came to fruition and the veil was lifted from my eyes. With clear vision, there was nothing left to do but turn to the Lord and address my past biblically.

But when one turns to the Lord, the veil is removed. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:16-18

Did you hear that dear friends? Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is FREEDOM! Aren’t those sweet words that we need to hear and be reminded of time and time again? We are not hopeless victims that can never recover from our past. We have the power of the Holy Spirit working in us to set us free and break the chains. Behind our bondage and every bad habit or behavior is a lie. When we speak falsehoods to ourselves and play untrue thoughts frequently, we convince ourselves that they are true. Commit your mind to the Lord so the lies can be eradicated and the Spirit can do a powerful work in your life. Christ made a way for us to find freedom from our past, in Him and through Him by His death on the cross.

Healing and Reconciliation

The Shame Game

Amy Larson

Everyone has an opinion these days, nowhere is this more evident than on social media. It doesn’t take long for a heated debate to flare up in the comments section. But, what good does it do to argue with strangers online? Often it is more about shaming or proving a point than it is about showing concern or understanding those with opposing views. The fact is that we won’t win people over by arguing with them.

This same lesson can be applied to our prodigal spouses. We can’t persuade them to see the folly of their ways by pointing out all of their “obvious” missteps. If our loved ones constantly hear us shaming them, they will withdraw and push us further away. Any progress on the path to restoration may be delayed simply because we have not learned to fully trust God during the standing process.

It isn’t our place to shame our prodigal for their bad behavior no matter how tempting it may be. Only the Holy Spirit can bring about conviction to the heart of our beloveds. This truth should be a blessing as it relieves us from this burden. That’s not to say as though we can’t do anything to influence or change our spouses’ direction. There are ways our words and actions can play a role in fostering conviction, but it must be done in obedience to God’s prompting and with great humility and love.

During our pause, Tommy realized early on that he couldn’t guilt me into repentance. (Furthermore, his efforts would have been counterproductive given my heart condition.) Instead, he used God’s Word as his guide and modeled his actions after the father in the parable of the the lost son (Luke 15:11-32). In this example in scripture, the father does not send his servants to track down the prodigal son. Nor does he question or lecture him; but rather, he patiently waits and eagerly watches for his son’s return. Although I know Tommy was frustrated by my selfish and rebellious behavior, it was the loving way he demonstrated grace and mercy that captured my attention. Our journey to reconciliation was arduous at times, but it was only accomplished through patience, humility, sacrifice and forgiveness.

May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you. Psalms‬ ‭25:21

Dear friend, if you have found yourself in a place where you are constantly confronting your prodigal, remind yourself that shaming won’t bring about the transformational change you desire to see in your spouse. It can be difficult accepting the fact that all you can do is pray for your loved one and wait on God’s perfect timing, but if the Father has called you to stand for your marriage, those should be your priorities. We often resort to shaming when we neglect the truth that it is God alone that has the power to realign hearts and heal relationships.

In Christ,
Amy Larson