Tag: Endurance

Holidays

Finding Hope Amidst the Holidays: Christ, Our Constant in Divorce

Purposed Marriage
A woman sitting in a cozy chair reading a book by a warm fireplace, surrounded by Christmas decorations and gifts.
"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness."
Lamentations 3:22-23

For many, Christmas is a season of unparalleled joy, family gatherings, and heartwarming traditions. But for you, navigating a divorce, especially during this time, the usual cheer can feel like a cruel mockery. Perhaps your home feels emptier, your traditions broken, and the pain of your dissolving marriage casts a long, dark shadow over the festive glow.

You are not alone in feeling this deep disconnect. The ache of a broken family during a season so focused on family unity can be incredibly isolating. You might be struggling to find even a flicker of the “reason for the season” when your own world feels like it’s falling apart.

But even in this profound pain, especially now, the message of Christmas remains profoundly relevant. The gift of Christ is not just for the joyful, the whole, or the untroubled. It is, perhaps most powerfully, for those who are broken, hurting, and desperately searching for a glimmer of hope.

The First Christmas: Not So Picture-Perfect

Think back to the very first Christmas. It wasn’t a perfectly polished, Instagram-ready scene. A young, pregnant woman and her bewildered fiancé, far from home, with no room at the inn. The birth of a baby in a stable, surrounded by animals. It was messy, inconvenient, and certainly not what anyone would have envisioned for the arrival of the King of Kings. Yet, in that humble, imperfect setting, God demonstrated His profound love and unwavering presence in the midst of human struggle and limitation.

Christ: Our Unchanging Gift

The greatest gift of Christmas is not wrapped in paper and tied with a bow; it is the person of Jesus Christ. He is Immanuel, “God with us.” And this “with us” isn’t conditional. He is with us in our triumphs, yes, but more profoundly, He is with us in our deepest valleys, our most agonizing heartbreaks, and our most profound disappointments.

In the midst of divorce, your life can feel like it’s been turned upside down. Relationships change, financial stability wavers, and future plans dissolve. It’s a time of immense uncertainty and loss. But Christ remains constant. He is the anchor for your soul in the storm. His love is not subject to the whims of human relationships or the breaking of vows. His grace is sufficient, even for this.

Finding Joy in the Midst of Sorrow

“Joy to the World” might feel like a distant echo right now. And that’s okay. The Bible doesn’t promise a life free from sorrow, but it does promise a God who is close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). True biblical joy isn’t a superficial happiness dependent on perfect circumstances; it’s a deep-seated confidence in God’s goodness and faithfulness, even when circumstances are anything but good.

How can you find this joy amidst your pain?

  1. Lean into His Presence: Even if you can’t feel it, know that He is near. Spend time in prayer, pouring out your heart to Him. Read His Word, allowing His promises to minister to your spirit.
  2. Focus on the True Gift: Shift your focus from what you’ve lost to what you still have in Christ. The gift of salvation, forgiveness, and eternal life is yours, regardless of your marital status. This is the ultimate “reason for the season.”
  3. Allow Yourself to Grieve: Don’t suppress your pain. God understands your sorrow. Jesus Himself wept. Give yourself permission to mourn the loss, but don’t stay stuck there. Let your grief eventually lead you to the Comforter.
  4. Seek Community: While some social gatherings might be difficult, seek out safe, supportive community – friends, family, or a church group who can offer empathy, prayer, and practical support without judgment.
  5. Serve Others: Sometimes, turning our focus outward can help us gain perspective. Even a small act of kindness or service to someone else can remind you of God’s love working through you.

This Christmas, know that your tears are seen, your pain is acknowledged, and your heart is not forgotten by God. The “reason for the season” isn’t about perfectly decorated trees or perfect family photos; it’s about the radical, unconditional love of a God who sent His Son to be with us, to save us, and to offer us enduring hope – even when our world feels like it’s crumbling.

May you find comfort in His presence and a renewed sense of hope in the unchanging gift of Christ this Christmas season.

Prodigals

When Truth is Toxic

Tommy Larson

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“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness,”

‭‭2 Timothy‬ ‭3:16‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Have you ever wondered why a spouse determined to leave avoids the truth at all costs? For those standing for their marriage, trying to engage a prodigal spouse in honest conversation can feel frustrating and futile. But when we recognize the enemy’s deception and how deeply it takes root, their resistance becomes clearer.

Those pursuing divorce often avoid difficult conversations because they fear exposure. The last thing someone running from the Lord wants is to be confronted with the truth of Scripture. God’s Word pierces the heart, revealing sin and selfish ambition. This conviction is why so many reject it.

During my separation, but before my divorce, I had a conversation with my wife. When I stood firm on God’s design for marriage and opposed divorce, she accused me of being like a Pharisee—too rigid, too unwilling to see the “spirit” of the law. But I reminded her that the Pharisees were the ones who exalted divorce, and Jesus condemned it. That conversation ended abruptly. She refused to discuss it further and warned that any future communication would go through our lawyers if I brought it up again.

I hadn’t meant to provoke anger, but I realized it wasn’t my words that struck a nerve—it was God’s truth piercing her heart. I was simply the messenger. The Word of God carries authority and power, and when spoken, it challenges the heart. Many who are caught in sin will react defensively, unwilling to face the conviction that truth brings.

For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.”

Hebrews‬ ‭4:12‬ ‭ESV

If you’re standing for your marriage, you will encounter anger and resistance. Take comfort in knowing it’s not truly you they oppose—their battle is with God. Those who stand for truth will always face resistance, but you are not alone. The enemy works tirelessly to deceive and divide, but God’s truth remains unshaken.

It’s easy to grow weary when your spouse continually rejects truth, but remember that your fight is not against them—it’s a spiritual battle. Ephesians 6:12 reminds us that “our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” This battle requires spiritual armor—prayer, faith, and perseverance.

With the help of the Holy Spirit and the support of those God has placed in your life, do not let your spouse’s rejection of truth weaken your resolve. Surround yourself with believers who will pray with you and encourage you. Spend time in God’s presence, allowing Him to strengthen your spirit. Christ has the power to transform even the hardest of hearts.

I have seen it firsthand. If Jesus could redeem my wife, He can do the same for your spouse. It may take time, and the road may be difficult, but God is still in the business of restoration. Stand firm, trust Him, and keep believing. Your faithfulness is never in vain.

In Christ,

Tommy Larson

Uncategorized

Fully Surrender

Amy Larson

I am convinced, divorce is one of the darkest and loneliest trials a person can face. Counseling others through separation and divorce, I’m often reminded of the deep hurt and pain that’s inflicted during the process. The anguish can be all-consuming, making simple tasks like eating, sleeping and getting dressed feel impossible. God created Adam a helpmate suitable in Eve because His design for marriage was life-long companionship. When marriages crumple and one or both spouses head down the path towards divorce, there is a ripping away of the one-flesh covenant. The pain is excruciating, and at times the suffering seems almost unbearable.

Thankfully, we have an ever-present Father. He hears us when we bury our heads in the pillow each night and silently cry ourselves to sleep. He’s alert when we shout out in desperation pleading with Him to save our marriages day after day. Our Savior longs to hear from us, and tells us to cast all our burdens upon Him because he cares for us (1 Peter 5:7). Perhaps you are crying out to the Lord, but have you released your worries into his hands? Have you surrendered everything? God’s greatest work begins in us when we recognize we have nothing left to offer and nothing else to give but ourselves. Our fully surrendered life is what the Father is after.

Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. Luke 9:23

Surrender is not a once and done task in the life of a believer. It is to be lived out daily, hour by hour and minute by minute. We must actively choose not to withhold anything from God. Unconditional surrender means to completely release control, trusting that the One to whom we surrender has a better plan for our lives than we do. Right now your marriage may be topsy-turvy, and your future may feel uncertain. If you find yourself fighting for control or feel overwhelmed by fear and anxiety, that’s a sign you need to release your situation over to the Lord and turn away from doing things your way.

When we release control, that’s when we find healing. For freedom is not obtained by our control, but through our surrender. We must trust and believe our loving Father’s promises from scripture, especially when we walk through life’s valleys.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

God will not waste your season of suffering, friends! He uses our trials for our good and His Glory!