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Finding Biblical Steadfastness in the New Year

Purposed Marriage
A radiant cross illuminated from behind, set against a dark background, symbolizing hope and faith.

As we stand at the threshold of a new year, the world around us is buzzing with the rhetoric of “fresh starts” and “new beginnings.” For many, this is a season of resolutions and excitement. But for those of you walking the painful path of divorce, these words can feel like salt in an open wound. You may find yourself looking at the calendar with a sense of dread, wondering how you are supposed to navigate a future that looks nothing like the one you promised before God and witnesses.

Many standers have learned that the turning of a leaf on a calendar does not automatically heal the fractures of the soul. In fact, the start of a year often magnifies the very things we wish to escape: the loneliness, the financial strain, and the heavy weight of broken vows. But as we enter this season, we offer a challenge to look past the worldly advice of “moving on” and instead look upward to the One who authored your life.

The Trap of the “Clean Slate”

The world tells you that a new year is the perfect time to “leave the past behind” and “find your own happiness.” This sounds like a relief to a heart that has been battered by conflict. However, we must be careful. If our version of a “new beginning” involves hardening our hearts against the biblical mandate for reconciliation or nursing a spirit of unforgiveness, we are not moving toward healing—we are moving toward a spiritual desert and rebellion.

We often rationalize that because our spouse “broke the covenant first,” we are free to pursue a new life on our own terms. But Scripture reminds us that we serve a God of reconciliation. “All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation” (2 Corinthians 5:18). This new year, ask yourself: Am I seeking God’s will for my restoration, or am I merely seeking an exit from my pain?

Facing the Giant of Loneliness

The silence of a home can feel deafening during January. The traditions that once defined your year have been stripped away, leaving an ache that feels impossible to fill. You might feel like Mary and Martha, weeping because Jesus didn’t arrive “on time” to save what was dying.

But remember the story of Lazarus. The delay that caused such grief was actually the stage for a greater miracle. If you find yourself alone this year, do not view it as God’s abandonment. View it as an invitation to intimacy. “The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him” (Lamentations 3:25). Use this time not to wallow in what was lost, but to feast on the Word. The more intimate your relationship with Christ becomes, the less power the sting of loneliness will have over you.

The Danger of Living in “What If”

As the new year begins, the enemy loves to keep us trapped in the “what ifs.” What if I had done more? What if they never change? This leads to a spirit of anxiety that stifles our faith. We try to put time constraints on God, demanding that He fix our circumstances or our spouse by a certain date.

To do so is a clear demonstration of a lack of faith. We must determine this very day to cast aside our preconceived notions of what “restoration” or “healing” must look like. Acknowledge that Christ alone is the author of your story. If this year brings continued hardship, trust that He is using it to remake you into His image—an image that is pleasing in His sight. Learn to wait on God and rely on His faithfulness.

A Call to Submission

If you are entering this year in the midst of a divorce, do not be led by your emotions or the “logical” advice of friends who do not hold a Kingdom perspective. While the counsel may be coming from a heart of concern and compassion, it may very well be the complete opposite of what is Biblically sound.

Forgiveness is possible, but only if you allow God to change your heart. You must first submit to His authority and acknowledge where pride or bitterness has taken root. Whether you are “standing” for your marriage or navigating the aftermath of a final decree, your priority remains the same: Seek first the Kingdom of God.

The calendar has turned, but God’s Word remains the same. He has provided everything you need to overcome the challenges of this season. It is all right there, contained in His Holy Word. Let this be the year you stop leaning on your own understanding and start walking in total submission to the King, our Lord Jesus Christ.

Judging, Offense, Spiritual Warfare

The Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage: Fighting with Faith and Prayer

Tommy Larson

For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds.

2 Corinthians 10:3-4

Marriage is a sacred covenant, a beautiful union designed by God to reflect His love for the Church. Yet, beneath the surface of many troubled marriages lie unseen battles—spiritual forces working relentlessly to destroy what God has joined together. While we often focus on visible struggles—neglect, addiction, and broken trust—the deeper, more insidious attacks come from the enemy who despises this holy bond.

When a Christian man and woman enter into Holy Matrimony, they forge more than just a legal or emotional commitment; they become one flesh, bound together in both body and spirit. Their union is a living testimony of Christ and His bride, the Church—a symbol so powerful that Satan and his demonic forces ferociously wage war against it. The Christian home is a prime target, and these attacks are often subtle, creeping in unnoticed until they manifest as bitterness, division, and despair.

The enemy’s tactics are cunning, striking at the very foundation of marriage. Many couples, unaware of the spiritual battle raging around them, seek worldly solutions—self-help strategies, therapy devoid of Biblical truth, or simply ignoring the problem—only to find themselves more entangled in struggle. The reality is that these battles are not merely physical or emotional; they are spiritual. And to fight a spiritual battle, we must wield spiritual weapons.

Scripture calls us to be vigilant, to recognize the unseen war and to arm ourselves with the truth of God’s Word. To neglect this reality is to walk into battle unarmed, and vulnerable to the enemy’s schemes. We must fight—not with anger, manipulation, or despair—but with prayer, fasting, and unwavering faith.

I learned this truth firsthand. Leading up to the heartbreaking day when my marriage ended in divorce, I became acutely aware that this was more than just a human conflict—it was a spiritual war. Though the legal decree was final, I knew in my heart that God was still at work. My wife was ensnared in battles far deeper than what was visible, and the only way to see victory was through the power of prayer.

I gathered an army of intercessors, lifting Amy up before the Lord daily. I prayed for the removal of ungodly influences, for the breaking of strongholds that were pulling her away from God’s plan. The answers did not come overnight, but they did come. One by one, through no earthly intervention, the toxic relationships and destructive forces in her life were stripped away. The voices of darkness were silenced, and the chains that bound her heart were broken. When those strongholds fell, her heart became fertile ground for true transformation. Praise the Lord!

If your marriage is under attack, do not lose hope. The battle may feel relentless, but you are not alone. God has equipped us with powerful weapons—His Word, prayer, fasting, and faith. When we stand firm, refusing to surrender to the enemy’s schemes, strongholds will fall. Do not grow weary. Satan is in this for the long haul, but so must we be. And take heart—greater is He who is in us than he who is in the world! (1 John 4:4). Victory belongs to the Lord.

Judging, Offense

The Hidden Path to Healing: Why Divorce Isn’t Always the Answer

Tommy Larson

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.

Philippians 2:1-2

For many individuals in strained marriages, where constant fighting or a cloud of anger seems to dominate, the thought of divorce can feel like the only escape. When the love that once bonded a couple seems to have faded, and all hope feels lost, divorce can seem like a viable solution—even for those who once held firm beliefs about the sanctity of marriage. But is it truly the only option?

I remember a time when my own marriage was on the brink of collapse. Divorce wasn’t something I had ever envisioned, especially not coming from my covenant bride. But when the day came and I was served divorce papers, it hit me like a punch to the gut. Even after I moved out of our home, I held onto the belief that reconciliation would come quickly. Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, yet with each passing day, my wife’s anger grew deeper. Despite initially telling me she wasn’t interested in pursuing divorce, the speed and intensity with which she began severing all ties between us was shocking.

Looking back now, years later, I can see clearly why the idea of divorce became so appealing to her. In many ways, I had given her little reason to stay in the marriage. I had allowed anger, selfishness, and harshness to take root. I stopped being loving, supportive, and attentive, and instead became distant, abrasive, and self-centered. I had allowed sin to creep in, creating a wedge between us. For my wife, the only way out of the pain she was enduring seemed to be a clean break—a way to stop the suffering that felt endless.

Coming from a Christian background, my wife knew well how God views divorce. She understood the deep harm it causes, especially when children are involved. But even with this understanding, she convinced herself that divorce was the only way forward—that it was the only path that could possibly lead her back to happiness and peace.

As I struggled to understand her decision, I began to see the external influences that were guiding her toward this painful choice. There were counselors who, without Scriptural grounding, encouraged her to pursue divorce. There were “Christian” friends who refused to speak truth into her life. And, of course, the internet was filled with voices that reinforced her desire to end the marriage. Sadly, she wasn’t seeking counsel from those who might have prompted her to search her own heart, to consider the possibility of healing, or to explore other options. Divorce had become the clear answer in her mind.

The sad truth is that many people today share this mindset. They feel as though they’ve exhausted every other option and that divorce is the only remaining choice. My wife was in this exact place. But looking back, I realize that there was one more option—a hidden path that she couldn’t see at the time. This path wasn’t easy or convenient. It wasn’t about finding an instant fix. It required humility, submission, and a willingness to obey the principles of Scripture. It was a choice rooted in faith and biblical obedience.

As Christians, we are called to the highest standard in our relationships. God’s Word makes it clear why He hates divorce, and also outlines the rare, specific circumstances under which it may be permissible. There’s no room for compromise or bending the rules. Yet in today’s culture, it’s all too easy to dismiss these hard teachings in favor of emotions, feelings, and well-intentioned advice from friends and family. But if we are truly honest with ourselves, we must ask: What is the God-honoring path?

It’s crucial to remember that marriages can be saved from divorce, but it requires a deep, unwavering commitment from both the husband and wife. One spouse alone cannot carry the weight of this effort. And at the heart of any effort to restore a marriage, there must be an unwavering devotion to Christ. When both spouses align their lives with Him, their relationship begins to change. They grow in understanding, unity, and love. What once were two separated individuals—both sinners in need of redemption—become one united couple, working together to honor God and build His kingdom.

True reconciliation isn’t just about fixing the issues of the moment—it’s about renewing the marriage through the transformative power of Christ. And this path, though difficult, can lead to a stronger, more fulfilling relationship than either spouse ever thought possible.