In this episode of the Purposed Marriage Podcast, we discuss the importance of genuine repentance and the role it plays in the process of reconciliation.
“I Want to Say I’m Sorry” by Andrew Peterson
youtu.be/ZEjf0oOBbe8
Are You Really Sorry?
Hope for Hurting Marriages – Purposed Marriage
Offering Hope for Hurting Marriages
First of all, great website and beautiful testimony of Gods work in your marriage. I found your blog through rejoice marriage ministries and ever since you shared, I’ve been enjoying reading and listening to your blog.
As a newly separated husband who so wants God to restore my marriage and family, your story is very encouraging. Thank you for the boldness to share. The conversations on your blog are especially helpful.
I wanted to see if you’d be able to explore this question in a future podcast. I can relate to Tom’s descent into selfishness and pride and giving up spiritual leadership in the home. Like Tommy, my name is even Tom, my wife left right around 10 years. Now I’m changing big and seeking Christ and challenging myself like never before.
The question is, it seems like Amy was totally right to leave you. Separate yes. Not saying divorce. But separate yes. No doubt she was pushed past her limit of being able to stay in the marriage in a Christ honoring way.
So when she left it seems she was not a prodigal but actually encouraging Tommy to grown whatever her intentions were. At divorce I can see her being a prodigal but not during separation.
Your thoughts?
I think it’s important to turn to Scripture for all of these questions. 1 Corinthians 7:10 speaks directly to this matter. Amy pushed me to leave so she could move forward unfettered with her plans for divorce. The separation was wrong on many levels. In terms of labels, we can define the prodigals as those who’s hearts have been hardened and calloused. This was absolutely the case for me for much of the marriage and then became so for my wife as the marriage began to unravel. We need to be careful how we justify things. So often, our retaliatory actions are based on our false sense of justice and our desire for restitution. We plan on speaking more to this on our blog and in future podcasts. It’s a topic and conversation worth exploring more.
To begin with your story is almost exactly like our except that I am Tom and my husband is Amy. I have done selfish and destructive things in our marriage and to my husband. I would do all the justifying, denying etc..of my behaviors and never own up. I’ve caused my husband so much emotional pain his heart is stone and the walls between us have become thick and icy. He too does not want to hear my apologies and mocks them. We haven’t separated yet but he’s moving in that direction. He is also not Christian.
I want desperately to change but since I haven’t does that mean I don’t have godly repentance? If yes can I get to that point and how?